Day of the Devil Mama

I have all these neat things I want to blog about, but today...oh my...today. Something happened this morning between my shower and burning my eggs. I'm not sure what it was, but it was like Satan was attacking me from all sides. Maybe it's that in 3 days I'm going to speak to a girls' Bible class about the pain of "not waiting" and I don't have a clue what I'm going to say. Maybe it's that the only girl in the class that I know told everyone how "awesome" I am...NO PRESSURE. 

Here is a rundown of the morning. I'll save you the complaining and just make a list.

Burnt eggs.

Kyle screaming the entire time I attempted to make a Lost Dog poster for our corgi...sniffle.

Spilled entire bag if makeup in the car. 

Couldn't find mascara or eyeliner. (Those are the most important next to foundation you know.)

Late for library story time.

Kyle knocked my coffee out of my hand at the front door of the library.

Shaving cream craft (enough said.)

Both animal shelters were unstaffed and locked.

Kids screaming in the car over Captain Crunch.

Driving around an apartment complex looking for the dog only to have the police chief call and ask why I am being so suspicious...he was joking...sort of.

I may have yelled...screamed...texted my husband to whine...laid on the couch... and drug myself to church. By this time I was turning around some. When we got home, Cole told me his Bible verse when  I wasn't really listening and then...then he said, "Mama can I start leading a Bible study for our family every Saturday night? Come on Carter lets go have Bible study right now!"

As the guilt of my wretchedness creeps in, I remember something I wrote a couple of years ago. "God knew I would be the best person to love, raise, and teach these precious babies even at my worst." God is using me despite myself. I'm not taking credit for Cole wanting to start a Bible study. That credit belongs to the amazing people at WNL. God is still at work in our family and in the hearts of these precious babies despite me, my attitude, and my selfishness. 

I'm thankful he has already paid my for my sins today and the guilt is gone. Let go of your guilt and realize that we can never be good mothers, sisters, friends, employees without HIM. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. Romans 7:18

There is nothing good in me but HIM.